When Men Change

Contrary to the title, changing here does not involve a change of clothes so don't expect a sexy seductive write up of those sort of matters. The title here mostly refers to a change of hearts in men. I for one am especially sensitive and alert to my men whenever they have such changes. It usually starts gradually, subtly and is usually quite obvious. Then they abruptly become quite different from before.

It usually is quite obvious when you're no longer their prime target. The messages dull, the kisses stop, the effort becomes incrementally less. And yet some hold on, putting in the minimal bare bones of effort to string you along for the ride as their insurance while they date around and test drive other prospective targets thinking you'll always stay for them. Taking you for granted. Thinking they can deceive through lies involving great amounts of work or other assorted excuses of being tired and what have you.

And then of course their "friends" become more and more important. Which friend? Hell that's a mystery to all. Random bits of tea time and fancy meals and even fancier places begin to appear in their social media. They make sly implied assertions as to who they are with. They tweet their betrayals without realising their silent audience and those they've left behind. Male ego, their ultimate downfall. Their belief in their inability to ever fall. Ever thinking themselves the master manipulators.

Then of course there are those fools that misuse the word love. Oh so very many of them. In the height of their passions they throw the word so casually as if to bind you under their feeble spell. But a man of my experience knows all too well half of these naive children or manipulative men use it as part of their game of knives and daggers meaning so little for using so loaded a word. Appalling. Such is the death of love I'd say.

Without trust, there is no foundation for any relationship. There is only constant suspicion and worry. I think I've come to the point in my life where I crave something more anchored, less temporal like the random screws with the slags and the skanks of the circle. But it's a shame really, you have all these lost boys with their commitment issues and their second heads doing all the thinking for them still, never realising what they have or had all along. I'm tired. I'm cynical. My optimism dims bit by bit.

If he lies to me again, its over and I leave. A lie of omission is still a lie, dishonestly made no matter how one may justify it as a half truth to begin with. I'm unimpressed. You look set to be another disappointment in a list of disappointments. Just another abuser of the L word, so casually thrown. I knew I shouldn't have let you in. We'll see who stays soon, and who goes, you or I.