I had some drama recently, and not of my own making really. It left me slightly disturbed and somewhat changed in my perception of things.
It began over the course of this weekend when I noticed a familiar face over Jack'd. It was an acquaintance of mine whom was a friend of my ex's. The problem however was that the real person was based in Singapore at the present time and I messaged him about it. We were both puzzled as to what this account was about and what this would mean.
The very next day on Sunday I received a message from the doppelganger. I did not know exactly how to react, knowing it was a fake account and so I ignored the message. A couple of hours later the clone sent another text asking me why I wasn't replying whilst revealing some very intimate secret details that only me and my ex knew of. That immediately made me suspicious, could the ex be trying to contact me again? What on earth was his motives? And why impersonate a friend suddenly.
He asked me if I missed him. Truth of the matter is I did, all the time. He asked me for a meet up at a gay bar in Soho. I was curious to get to the bottom of this mystery and so I agreed and hurried along. Funnily enough he told me he was wearing a dark blue shirt and a brown leather jacket. I checked what I was wearing. Dark blue shirt and brown leather jacket. That sent a chill down my spine and I began looking around. Could this silent stalker/clone/possible ex be spying on me from a distance?
I arrived at the club. I hid in a corner and asked where he was. He mentioned he was at the entrance. I walked there and saw no sign of the ex so I repeated my query again and stepped out to the street.
All of a sudden a random middle aged white male approaches me and asks if I am "Lin Lin" (the name the clone used on Jack'd). The weight of what was going on began dawning upon me. The white male showed me his phone. The clone was messaging him asking for a meet up before using my photos.....and revealing my true name. He claimed that was his true face. It was at this point I had an odd mixture of emotions ranging from fear, anger to outright sadness.
It appeared we were all set up, and I was the butt of the joke. The clone then began using my pictures on Jack'd instead. I asked him what he wanted, why he was doing such things. His only reply:
Because you're a bad person don't you know?
I ranted, I raged at what I thought might be my ex. He just called me delusional. Finally all I could say was this:
At least I never broke your heart the way you did mine.
And thereafter stopped replying. I removed all pictures. I faded away. The only vestige on my profile being "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, karma will hurt." He removed my face. No messages came in ever since.
If it is indeed my ex, I wonder why would he do this now? If it is indeed him (and most likely based on all the facts) perhaps he's trying to make me hate him so I won't think of him any further? The last form of interaction I had with him was a small email earlier in the month wishing him a happy birthday. If this is his method to make me fuck off he's doing a very good job. I once thought a part of me would love him forever. I think that part just died. I've never been so humiliated or ill treated by anyone for the life of me.
All I can wonder is how someone whom once loved you so much, who meant so much to you and you to them can become so very cruel when everything ends. How is it that something once so beautiful and deep can morph into such pettiness and vengefulness? I may never know, but one thing I do know is that sometimes we may fall in love with the wrong person. Sometimes we may think they were the pinnacle of goodness despite all imperfections, but when the chips are down and you stand in the way of their objectives they can quickly showcase a very dark and nasty side. Such a shame, I for one would never do what he did to anyone. No one deserves this. Goodbye Dr.K, you reap what you sow. I loved you, I really did....but I just cannot anymore.
PS: Here's a scarier thought, what if the clone wasn't the ex? Who have I pissed off this time? Sigh.
Showing posts with label scare. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scare. Show all posts
Tuesday, 21 May 2013
Monday, 11 March 2013
Misadventures
I think I have a magnetic personality. I have a tendency to attract weirdness and misadventures my way and towards the people around me. Take this incident at the bus stop in a dodgy street in London one night. Was sending a friend off one night yes when this gang of fuck knows what ethnicity approaches us and one of these randomers begin striking up a conversation. Not sure if he's plain bored waiting for the bus to arrive or just finds himself having a strong compulsive need to talk to young Asian boys.
So he asks us what we're up to yes, where are we off to and whether clubbing is our sort of thing. Malaysians and Singaporeans and hell Asians in general usually just entertain these gestures cause we don't want to be impolite you see. Under normal circumstances I'd ask the creeper to bugger off but since he's being "nice" to us we decided to give quasi affirmative responses. Despite being a tad uncomfortable in the dimly lit bus stop at night.
Out of nowhere his even creepier friend nudges his way under our umbrella to claim shelter from the rain around us. At this juncture I was getting a tad crossed that he was starting to invade my personal space so I told him to sod off to the bus shelter just beside us. But he insists on standing with us and proceeds to grab my hand and lift the umbrella higher when I pull from his grip and threaten legal action on him. What was I to do, the buggers were either high, pissing on Asians or just plain harassing me by that point and I wasn't going to have anything to do with it. Pulled the lawyer card out of fear and they backed off abit. Probably due to the other people at the bus stop as well.
And when the bus arrived, even though it was the wrong sort to the wrong destination, we got our arses on because street experience tells me I'd rather be safe than sorry you see.
Incident 2 happens just a couple of days later when I'm out on a spontaneous outing with this girl from my dinings and home town. We've gotten quite a great deal closer over the last few days because like I said before, fate is weird that way. Considering Korean boy was unable to attend the dining sessions and she was alone there that night too we just naturally clicked being Subang folk and all before going on many spontaneous adventures around the city. Guess I shall not preemptively presume what we are or where we're going but suffice to say on Sunday after a session at the Inns of Court we headed to Selfridges to look at brands far too expensive for either of us to really afford just to kill time and fantasize about the future.
Now this other randomer pops by as we're looking at some quirky overpriced designer products and tells us he's a fancy PHD student at LSE or something and acts all friendly. Us being polite decide to play along with his act when he offers for us to take down his number and before we realise it he's jamming it into the girl's cellphone before giving himself a call. Fuck me senseless, I must make a pretty shit straight boyfriend being unable to defend a girl from random twat-head here obviously hitting on her.
Then I did something spontaneous of course. I told him in these words, "I'm sure my wife and I would love to hang with you some time." whilst holding her close. Don't think he took us seriously but he went about his merry way after and she turned to me then.
"Wife? Not even girlfriend, but wife?"
And so I gave her a sort of cheeky smile, "Sorry but I just needed to cook up an excuse to make him sod off. Figured if you were my wife he'd be more apprehensive since people steal girl friends all the time."
She stares back into my eyes before saying, "Yea, quick thinking, Mrs <insert my surname here> it is then huh?" Before delivering her own cheeky smile. Heh, women.
PS: And yes obviously the creeper texts her and I suggest putting my profile picture on her Whatsapp to make him go away for abit. Let's see if that happens.
So he asks us what we're up to yes, where are we off to and whether clubbing is our sort of thing. Malaysians and Singaporeans and hell Asians in general usually just entertain these gestures cause we don't want to be impolite you see. Under normal circumstances I'd ask the creeper to bugger off but since he's being "nice" to us we decided to give quasi affirmative responses. Despite being a tad uncomfortable in the dimly lit bus stop at night.
Out of nowhere his even creepier friend nudges his way under our umbrella to claim shelter from the rain around us. At this juncture I was getting a tad crossed that he was starting to invade my personal space so I told him to sod off to the bus shelter just beside us. But he insists on standing with us and proceeds to grab my hand and lift the umbrella higher when I pull from his grip and threaten legal action on him. What was I to do, the buggers were either high, pissing on Asians or just plain harassing me by that point and I wasn't going to have anything to do with it. Pulled the lawyer card out of fear and they backed off abit. Probably due to the other people at the bus stop as well.
And when the bus arrived, even though it was the wrong sort to the wrong destination, we got our arses on because street experience tells me I'd rather be safe than sorry you see.
Incident 2 happens just a couple of days later when I'm out on a spontaneous outing with this girl from my dinings and home town. We've gotten quite a great deal closer over the last few days because like I said before, fate is weird that way. Considering Korean boy was unable to attend the dining sessions and she was alone there that night too we just naturally clicked being Subang folk and all before going on many spontaneous adventures around the city. Guess I shall not preemptively presume what we are or where we're going but suffice to say on Sunday after a session at the Inns of Court we headed to Selfridges to look at brands far too expensive for either of us to really afford just to kill time and fantasize about the future.
Now this other randomer pops by as we're looking at some quirky overpriced designer products and tells us he's a fancy PHD student at LSE or something and acts all friendly. Us being polite decide to play along with his act when he offers for us to take down his number and before we realise it he's jamming it into the girl's cellphone before giving himself a call. Fuck me senseless, I must make a pretty shit straight boyfriend being unable to defend a girl from random twat-head here obviously hitting on her.
Then I did something spontaneous of course. I told him in these words, "I'm sure my wife and I would love to hang with you some time." whilst holding her close. Don't think he took us seriously but he went about his merry way after and she turned to me then.
"Wife? Not even girlfriend, but wife?"
And so I gave her a sort of cheeky smile, "Sorry but I just needed to cook up an excuse to make him sod off. Figured if you were my wife he'd be more apprehensive since people steal girl friends all the time."
She stares back into my eyes before saying, "Yea, quick thinking, Mrs <insert my surname here> it is then huh?" Before delivering her own cheeky smile. Heh, women.
PS: And yes obviously the creeper texts her and I suggest putting my profile picture on her Whatsapp to make him go away for abit. Let's see if that happens.
Thursday, 17 January 2013
Rape
The call came in at 7 in the morning just as I was finally going to get myself some shut eye. I knew I couldn't deny a friend in need, not now after all I'd come to know. He came in weary, tired, deflated. The spirit had dimmed in his eyes. And then he relayed his story. His shame. His guilt.
Rape against women is a subject that has been extensively studied and the female victim often receives extensive support from society at large and their family and friends. But male victims are often hushed up, silenced and relegated to the sidelines. They bear their burdens in abject silence, and fear, alone and sullen.
Here was a friend who bore the marks, whom had suffered greatly. It has been a month since the attack, and his confidence, self esteem and worth had been utterly shattered. I consoled as best I could, I learned of the near suicidal attempts to jump into the River Thames and I could only imagine the horrors and trepidations of the victim. Imagine, but never fully comprehend.
Rape fantasies are one thing, but at least I always knew I still had control. In the brief periods in my bedsheet trysts whenever I thought a man would not stop, I'd always have a brief flicker of fear but it would always calm down when they backed down and everything would relegate to good simple fun. Not my friend though, no. Held down against his will, drunk and bewildered by a stronger conscious man he could only submit. There was very nearly chloroform involved in the attempt and he could only pray he would come out in one piece alive by the night's end. His saving grace was that the bareback entry had not ended in a climax, and he had quietly snuck out when the bastard fell asleep.
This is a precautionary tale, of why you do not leave your friends alone at the club or bar especially after a night out when everyone is pissed drunk. Its a shame really that the westerners don't take greater care of their friends in times like these. And it alarms me that the rapist was an East Asian man whom perpetrated this violent sexual assault, bareback if I might add, on my white friend. It shows that the face of evil know no bounds and could be anyone.
I tried encouraging him to make his police report, to prosecute the monster in court. But the things we learn about the victims in criminal classes just rung true. The fear, the fatigue, the intimidation of facing the attacker once more. All of this stood to silence the victims into quiet submission. How tragic. But if I could inspire in him one thing, from all these events, it would be to press formal charges and put this monster behind bars and realise that he has played his part in saving others from becoming victims in the future and would restore at least some self worth once more.
No time for petty love triangles at this time, right now I have a friend in need.
Rape against women is a subject that has been extensively studied and the female victim often receives extensive support from society at large and their family and friends. But male victims are often hushed up, silenced and relegated to the sidelines. They bear their burdens in abject silence, and fear, alone and sullen.
Here was a friend who bore the marks, whom had suffered greatly. It has been a month since the attack, and his confidence, self esteem and worth had been utterly shattered. I consoled as best I could, I learned of the near suicidal attempts to jump into the River Thames and I could only imagine the horrors and trepidations of the victim. Imagine, but never fully comprehend.
Rape fantasies are one thing, but at least I always knew I still had control. In the brief periods in my bedsheet trysts whenever I thought a man would not stop, I'd always have a brief flicker of fear but it would always calm down when they backed down and everything would relegate to good simple fun. Not my friend though, no. Held down against his will, drunk and bewildered by a stronger conscious man he could only submit. There was very nearly chloroform involved in the attempt and he could only pray he would come out in one piece alive by the night's end. His saving grace was that the bareback entry had not ended in a climax, and he had quietly snuck out when the bastard fell asleep.
This is a precautionary tale, of why you do not leave your friends alone at the club or bar especially after a night out when everyone is pissed drunk. Its a shame really that the westerners don't take greater care of their friends in times like these. And it alarms me that the rapist was an East Asian man whom perpetrated this violent sexual assault, bareback if I might add, on my white friend. It shows that the face of evil know no bounds and could be anyone.
I tried encouraging him to make his police report, to prosecute the monster in court. But the things we learn about the victims in criminal classes just rung true. The fear, the fatigue, the intimidation of facing the attacker once more. All of this stood to silence the victims into quiet submission. How tragic. But if I could inspire in him one thing, from all these events, it would be to press formal charges and put this monster behind bars and realise that he has played his part in saving others from becoming victims in the future and would restore at least some self worth once more.
No time for petty love triangles at this time, right now I have a friend in need.
Sunday, 2 December 2012
Men and Hormones
Holy Mackarel, nearly got myself into something I might regret recently. So after having a jolly decent Friday with some friends over from Manchester and Saturday morning/afternoon with Subang boy from summer I went back home to chill and get my work done (but we all know that never happens). Had myself a ring on Jack'd and checked it out. Turns out some relatively good looking Asian dude was unlocking his nude photos. Now normally this is the point where I block people off, but if they're sufficiently attractive and my hormones are acting up temptation settles in.
So yes I decided to entertain the nude man, probably began thinking with the other head instead. Then he invited me for a threesome, because conventional sex is too boring for some you see. His other friend then messages me with more unlocked nude pictures and I thought he wasn't too bad either. Was talking to Kayson over Facebook whether to indulge or not and then I suddenly had myself a really bad gut feeling that I might catch a particular disease I did not want. Further I really really did not want to end up in a ditch somewhere in East London with a used condom up my arse and so I did what was necessary and blocked the horny pair. Oh did I feel righteous that night.
Then Sunday came, and Mr Banker did not call so I can presume that we're just not that into each other. One case settled and sorted. Decided to open Grindr this time around and saw an Asian guy that was relatively nearby. Do you see a pattern here yet? Not me being a horny twat, but my excessive love and preference for Asians. I'm such a Rice Queen. Yea gay lingo here in the West is pretty fancy smancy with East Asians being called Rice, whites Potatoes, Indians Curry etc.
But yes suffice to say he invited me over for a quick shag. Now I have no idea what possessed me this time around but I actually got out of my house and went over to the street where he was. As I was headed there I realised I might be slightly stupid coming into this dodgy a neighbourhood, this late at night in the cold winter. So I called him up and realised that there were other people in the house as well and it wasn't going to be a one to one thing. Obviously this is the point where I began asking myself what the fuck I was even doing here and when he showed up to invite me in I refused.
And got the fuck out of there pronto.
No really, I knew I was young and horny but I definitely did not have to add reckless and stupid as adjectives to the equation. Luckily at least on the face of it the guy was cool with my refusal but holy blazing hells imagine if I had gone into that home where 3 other guys were waiting to give me a gang bang of the century. I'm highly tempted to get rid of these apps again, London will be my downfall good god.
And back to writing legal Opinions because I'm a boring downer. Tsk tsk.
So yes I decided to entertain the nude man, probably began thinking with the other head instead. Then he invited me for a threesome, because conventional sex is too boring for some you see. His other friend then messages me with more unlocked nude pictures and I thought he wasn't too bad either. Was talking to Kayson over Facebook whether to indulge or not and then I suddenly had myself a really bad gut feeling that I might catch a particular disease I did not want. Further I really really did not want to end up in a ditch somewhere in East London with a used condom up my arse and so I did what was necessary and blocked the horny pair. Oh did I feel righteous that night.
Then Sunday came, and Mr Banker did not call so I can presume that we're just not that into each other. One case settled and sorted. Decided to open Grindr this time around and saw an Asian guy that was relatively nearby. Do you see a pattern here yet? Not me being a horny twat, but my excessive love and preference for Asians. I'm such a Rice Queen. Yea gay lingo here in the West is pretty fancy smancy with East Asians being called Rice, whites Potatoes, Indians Curry etc.
But yes suffice to say he invited me over for a quick shag. Now I have no idea what possessed me this time around but I actually got out of my house and went over to the street where he was. As I was headed there I realised I might be slightly stupid coming into this dodgy a neighbourhood, this late at night in the cold winter. So I called him up and realised that there were other people in the house as well and it wasn't going to be a one to one thing. Obviously this is the point where I began asking myself what the fuck I was even doing here and when he showed up to invite me in I refused.
And got the fuck out of there pronto.
No really, I knew I was young and horny but I definitely did not have to add reckless and stupid as adjectives to the equation. Luckily at least on the face of it the guy was cool with my refusal but holy blazing hells imagine if I had gone into that home where 3 other guys were waiting to give me a gang bang of the century. I'm highly tempted to get rid of these apps again, London will be my downfall good god.
And back to writing legal Opinions because I'm a boring downer. Tsk tsk.
Wednesday, 28 November 2012
The Clutz
Woke up early today and rushed to the station only to find out en route to uni that the advocacy session I had been preparing for the night before had been cancled due to some gaffe the tutor had with being unable to find a babysitter for her child. Bollocks these people. So the tired zombie that was I survived whatever remaining classes I had before rushing back for the comforts my bed would promise.
Was on the train when I spotted this cute Asian girl. Took a seat next to her, noticed her little travel book. Tourist then. Noticed the Hangul script on the book. Korean then, and all alone as a tourist. Briefly contemplated striking a conversation but my mind was a touch tired from the lack of sleep and I decided to see where she would stop off at first. Happy coincidence it was then that she got off at the same stop as I, probably to see the fancy European markets (their closest equivalent to our Pasar Malam) my general area of residence had.
So I got a tad distracted looking in her general direction, acting cool like an idiot and tapping my ticket to the exit side by side. Until someone started screaming that was. Turning around I noticed an elder British man in the midst of tripping over my elongated trolley suitcase. And falling. Fuck me, the embarrassment and fear I felt as I helped him get up. Threw me a long line of curses despite my apologies. Condescending stares by the gathering crowd. Korean girl was staring at the incident, gave me a quick smile and went about her merry way. God, silly me, but then again I couldn't reasonably be responsible for people choosing my bag to trip over considering its rush hour in the tube and congestion is a bitch.
Let's hope I don't get served a subsequent personal injury claim. The man seemed fine but he was mighty angry. Knowing this country people sue on some of the most minute and remotest things always blaming others for their own negligence. Fly kite la people, I'd rather pay a solicitors legal costs than for someone's blame game. But yea, maybe I should stop looking at girls in crowded areas next time myself heh heh.
Was on the train when I spotted this cute Asian girl. Took a seat next to her, noticed her little travel book. Tourist then. Noticed the Hangul script on the book. Korean then, and all alone as a tourist. Briefly contemplated striking a conversation but my mind was a touch tired from the lack of sleep and I decided to see where she would stop off at first. Happy coincidence it was then that she got off at the same stop as I, probably to see the fancy European markets (their closest equivalent to our Pasar Malam) my general area of residence had.
So I got a tad distracted looking in her general direction, acting cool like an idiot and tapping my ticket to the exit side by side. Until someone started screaming that was. Turning around I noticed an elder British man in the midst of tripping over my elongated trolley suitcase. And falling. Fuck me, the embarrassment and fear I felt as I helped him get up. Threw me a long line of curses despite my apologies. Condescending stares by the gathering crowd. Korean girl was staring at the incident, gave me a quick smile and went about her merry way. God, silly me, but then again I couldn't reasonably be responsible for people choosing my bag to trip over considering its rush hour in the tube and congestion is a bitch.
Let's hope I don't get served a subsequent personal injury claim. The man seemed fine but he was mighty angry. Knowing this country people sue on some of the most minute and remotest things always blaming others for their own negligence. Fly kite la people, I'd rather pay a solicitors legal costs than for someone's blame game. But yea, maybe I should stop looking at girls in crowded areas next time myself heh heh.
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